Night weaning 2yo... three weeks in still terrible

carawaynow

I'm having a hard time night weaning my 2 yo DD, and I wondered if anyone had any insight/experiences to share. Sorry this is such a long detailed post from a lurker. I think I just need to get it all out!

A little background: I unexpectedly got a part time job after being a SAHM. She was still nursing at LEAST every two hours all night long, and usually every hour, so I knew I had to do something to be able to function in an academic setting again. So three weeks ago I started night weaning, and two weeks ago she started daycare MWF full days. She still nurses to sleep for naps on days we're together.

I had tried night weaning her before (when she just turned 2) but gave up because we traveled internationally and in the states and it just didn't seem worth it. But based on that experience (I tried just getting her to sleep with out nursing but continued nursing through out the night), I decided it would be easier for us both to do cold turkey no nursing to sleep and no nursing until 5am, at which point she will nurse and dose.

So the first 3-4 nights were awesome - she cried hard and was very angry at first, but fell asleep quickly and slept for like 5 hr stretches which was AMAZING. Then it started to fall apart - she started to take longer and longer to fall asleep, and started waking more often and needing me to help her back asleep.

 

On a typical night now, here's how it goes: Dinner, maybe bath, pajamas, nurse, books, bed. I lay in her floor bed (in our room) with her and pretend I'm asleep. She cries asking for water (I give it to her once but not after that), new diaper (also change once if wet), to get up, to have me sit up, etc etc. I ignore her and pretend I'm asleep for the most part, and put her back in bed if she tries to get out. Then she plays for quite a while, talking to herself or her stuffed animal, etc. Anywhere from 30min - 2hrs later, she fusses a little and then falls asleep. Then through out the night she wakes up crying, sometimes falls right back asleep if I lay down with her, sometimes wants me to rock her in bed (which I probably shouldn't do, but am soooo tired), sometimes goes back to sleep quickly but sometimes is up crying/dosing off and on for hours - last night it was 1.5hrs. She still wakes up almost every 2hrs or so. Then at 5 I nurse her and she sleeps/nurses until anywhere between 7:30am and 9:45am depending on how much she was up crying. 

Ugh. I feel like this is not getting better. I'm sure it has to do with 2 big changes at once (daycare and nightweaning), and of course I'm stressed about being back in the classroom again. Just not sure what to do differently, if anything. I feel sooooo terrible that this is so rough for her. Daycare is also rough - she cries a lot at drop off, etc, although she does have fun there too, and it's a fantastic center that I absolutely trust so that helps. Any words of wisdom? 

 

ETA: She has a clock in her room with all but the first number blocked off, and she knows to look at it and that she can nurse when it says 5. This morning she was crying off and on and when it turned 5 she bolted up right and said "It's FIVE now!!! Now we can have some nuh-num!!" so she definitely gets that part of it.