Am I in the wrong? (kind of long)

HarleyKins

I come from a divorced family as well as have a pretty big friend base (including hubby's work peeps). So I thought to save cost, I'd suggest 2 showers. I didn't think it was fair for my 2 friends throwing the shower to be having to pay for hosting (at tops) 70 people.

We decided to have a Friends shower and a Family shower.

This is where it falls apart.

I called my mom in early Feb to see if she knew of anyone planning on hosting a family shower for me. I am an only child, so no sisters/sil's to host one. She said no, and I said fine, then there won't be one. She then called my aunt to see if my aunt could host it, with my mom.

I got an email on 2/21 that the family shower was to be April 7 at my aunts and that my dad's side was not included - Mom's side, Step Dad's side, husband's side. My DH and I come from small families, so the total number of women - inluding my dad's side - would have been about 24 provided they all came.

I blew a gasket, to say the least. First she told me that ALL family would be included and I was really hurt when she said a few weeks later that my dad could host his own shower.I told her to cancel it if if 4 extra people were going to break the bank on the family shower. She said I was over reacting (yeah maybe but Family is Family, not just a portion and I haven't seen people on my step dads side in 3 years)

This past Monday, my MIL said that she'd be attending my Friend shower since she would be traveling on 4/7. No big deal I thought. Until she invited my 2 SIL's and niece to the shower too. Mind you, I had invited my mom to the friend shower and the 4 women she wanted to have come that are Her friends.

I emailed my mom and told her that ALL family was now invited last minute to Friend shower on 3/16 - I told everyone sorry for the last minute, but if you can make it, that'd be great, but if not, completely understood.

She thew a guilt trip that she had to return things and that I owe her an appology for over reacting and to not invite any family. BUT I know that had she seen my DH's side at the friend shower, she'd pout and tell me that it wasn't fair to not invite all my family. Catch 22 right?

Am I wrong? Am I a hormonal B*tch for cancelling the family shower and trying to include everyone into this one?? I am paying for some of the extra/added costs as my friends shouldn't have to. It's a mess and I'd truly thought my mom would be thrilled to help host a shower for her only child and only grandchild.

I guess I'm a B, eh?