Baby Shower - MIL/SIL Issue

mikeandcristina

Not sure if MIL and SIL should be invited to my baby shower ? DH and I haven?t had the best relationship with his side of the family since getting married. Grab some popcorn and I?ll give you all the run down.

 

DH put his foot down with his family almost 2 years ago and hasn?t seen them or hardly talked to them since, FIL runs his mouth about us (especially me) to anyone that will listen. (We were married for over a year before DH finally stood up for us). When DH confronted him about it, FIL said he never meant to hurt DH, and that he would apologize to me, but ended up informing me that ?he will talk about whoever he wants whenever he wants,? as well as some other nasty things. He didn?t realize DH was listening to the conversation, and for the last 2 years, while he still runs his mouth, he calls and leaves voicemails for DH saying that he never said the things we both heard during the ?apology,? and ?Son, I miss you. Hope you?re doing ok.?  

 

We live 2 hours away from his family, and whenever DH gets a call from a family or childhood friend, it is always because they are concerned about what the FIL is saying about us, and they want us to be aware of what is being said. In addition to this, the night before our wedding FIL was in the lobby of our hotel running his mouth about us to my relatives (I don?t think he realized), and there was a confrontation between FIL and my mother.

 

DH calls his mom when necessary (once every 6 or so months), she never calls him, and we don?t get invited to family holidays, birthdays, events, etc. When DH called to tell her we were prego, she said ?Ok, I need to go.?

 

DH was raised very conservatively, and seems to think they don?t care for me because I?m not submissive and I stand up for myself and up to his dad (I am very respectful), which his dad doesn?t like. Also, my family is white collar and his is blue collar, and DH thinks his dad is jealous of what my family has. I think FIL is jealous of what DH has, we own a home, farmland, he drives a new truck, etc, and he?s worked his ass of to get where he is. (FIL wanted him to work in the factory where he works instead of going to college.)

 

BIL and SIL informed us that they were taking his parent?s side, we informed them that there shouldn?t be any sides being taken, and that we just want his dad to stop. We don?t speak with them either, unless they call asking for rent money.

 

So, do I invite MIL and SIL? I don?t want drama, and I want to enjoy my day. DH is on the fence, and I don?t know what to do because I want to respect his feelings? My opinion is that they have had nothing to do with us, so theres no reason to invite them. We are afraid that FIL will come with them if we do invite them, even if we say not to bring him - I don?t want that stress, and I don't want this to come to a head in front of all my family and friends.

 

Opinions? Give it to me straight, I don't like sugar coating!