need to vent -pet related

newbeachbride

We have a cat that is going to be 9 next month, we got him when he was 9 months old and he has been an ongoing issue since they day we adopted him.  I have a feeling the first owners knew of his problem but never disclosed it to us and thats why they got rid of him.  When he's mad/upset/stressed/guests visit/DH goes out of town for any reason he will use our carpets (and has been known to use furniture for pee and pooping.  Over the years he has cost us many dollars in vet visits and medicine that have done nothing to help.  Not to mention the furniture and rugs he has ruined as well.  The only thing we can do is lock him up in the laundry room with his litter box and monitor his going to the bathroom, like in the mornings if he doesn't poop he can't come out.  When he can't come out it's the most annoying thing in the world b.c all you do is hear him howl and cry. He's even pawed at the door until his paws bleed.

I love animals but I really wish we never had gotten a cat,  when I was a kid we never had this issue with a cat.  Now that baby #2 is on the way it's going to be more work for me to keep an eye on him and it's ever harder when DH travels for work and I'm alone.  It's also upsetting me b.c the house we just put an offer on has an open floor plan and there is no way to contain him to a certain section of the house except for him living only in the laundry room.  I refuse to let this cat ruin another carpet or piece of furniture again.  I feel like thousands of dollars have already been wasted on furniture that we've had to get rid of.

DH will never get rid of this cat, and I know the right thing to do is deal with it but it's so frustrating being the one that gets stuck dealing with him b.c I am home and it upsets me every time this happens .

Does anyone have any advice on how to cope?  FWIW the cat loves our daughter and has never showed aggression towards her so I guess thats one good thing, but I really don't know how to cope with this issue.

Please don't flame me, I'm just very frustrated right now and I really need advice on how to handle this.  Half the time I wonder how many more years will I have to put up with this, and I know it's a horrible thing to think but I'm not sure how I'm supposed to just deal with an animal that continually ruins our home.