I feel so good!

overtonhayes

I felt like sharing. I feel AMAZING. Sadly not "I feel all healthy and glowy" amazing: I still feel like a hippo who's going to barf or cry at any moment. But 'amazing' in terms of "I CAN'T WAIT!".

It probably helps that I'm about the most maternal woman on this earth. I actually wrote a story for my future daughter nearly two years ago, back when I thought kids were still 6-8 years away. The moment I found out I was pregnant I ordered baby fabrics and stuffed toy patterns and even taught myself to knit (that's still a work in progress). And I've already pictured everything, from the really lovely stuff (holding a tiny, sleeping baby in my arms); to the cringey stuff ("where do babies come from?"); to the downright horrible stuff ("I'm a teenager now and I hate you so much!"); and figured out how to (hopefully!) handle it. I already know how I want to teach my kids French; teach them about God; teach them why Mummy and Daddy sound so different (I'm English, he's American); and how to teach them to be respectful of others and appreciate what they have. I've even thought about what to do if my teenage daughter tells me she's pregnant; if my kids want tattoos or piercings; if they tell me they have a crush; if they tell me they have a crush on someone of the same sex; if they're being bullied; bully-ing... Everything!

Of course I'm not saying I know everything there is to know about parenting, but I just feel so connected to this baby. I don't even think of him/her as my 'baby', but my child, since I can already see past the baby stage. I'm so excited to be a mother, and not a moment goes by when I'm not thinking about my Lillian/Connor.

Slightly worried I'm going to wind up convincing myself "this parenting thing is going to be EASY!" and have the biggest shock of my life, but does anyone else feel the same? Has anyone else already thought about their 'policies' towards certain things, e.g. tattoos?