WWYD shower drama (long)

nonniedee

I did not want a baby shower. I made this very clear to everyone who asked, but apparently nobody gives a crap. My step-mom really wanted to throw me a shower and, I politely declined, but then she started talking about how excited she was for the baby and I felt bad. Her eldest son is gay,and younger son is 8, so there's not a whole lot in store in terms of grandchildren in the near future.

My sister is also pregnant (not my dad's kid), and so my step-mom called her up with the intention of surprising me with a joint baby shower. My sister knowing how bad of an idea this was told me all about it, and managed to talk me into letting it happen. So, as it stands we will be having the shower sometime in late April early May. She's due exactly one month after me so it works out

 

Where the drama comes is my mom felt left out of the process, and threw a big stink. She says my dad and step-mom are always trying to throw money around,and leave her outta stuff. This isn't true. My mom told me herself that she will not be playing a big part in me or my child's life. As far as I'm concerned she just doesn't wanna be shown up. She told my sister that she's gonna call SM, and tell her how she's feeling. I want to intervene, but I feel like it will make things worse for SM. If my mom thinks I'm picking sides then the attitude will get worse. She's also salty because I have every attention of letting Ladybug call SM grandma. This woman has been a part of my life for 20 years, and I love her. If my SF were alive then he would be Grandpa as well. Mom wants her BF to be called grandpa, and that's just not happening. They got together when I was an adult, and he had no part in raising me. She feels as if I'm not being fair, but I don't take those titles lightly.  Altogether I just see this becoming one giant shiit show. So any advice would be appreciated