Looking for some advice from others who's wives misscarried

dkaplan76

So we're setting up our (2nd) 1st appointment. Last time we did it right away at week 6 or so while this time we're waiting till the middle of week 8. Obviously we're a little more apprehensive about the whole 1st trimester - especially since it was a missed miscarriage.

We also fee like last time when we kind of knew something was amiss - we didn't advocate for ourselves strongly enough. Something we want to correct this time.

For those of you who have unfortunately been through this as well, what did you do different the next time? We're thinking we probably want an earlier ultrasound - just to alleviate fears and get us a positive experience to build off of, but not sure what else we should ask for - or need to ask for - to help with the obvious issues we are dealing with.

Last time the plan was a ultrasound at week 12 (the day after we miscarried) - and before that they didn't plan on anything. No dopplar, no hormone level tracking. Adding to the concern is we are going to be in Italy for weeks 12 and 13 - right around the same time we miscarried last time - so some reassurance prior to going would be helpful.

And while we get from an intellectual point of view that one miscarriage does not equal a problem, and that the pregnancy is normal until it's not and there is little we can do about it - but from an emotional standpoint we are both on edge.

Any suggestions you might have (even if it's - just relax, asking for more tests is not the answer) is appreciated.