Intro and advice, please. Very long

Ehoughton12

I'm 20, FTM, and single by choice. Shortly after I found out I was pregnant, I left my baby's father. He's 26 and the most irresponsible person I've ever met. We were together for over a year and he was unemployed for well over half of that. But, love is blind and I mentioned over and over how he needed to get a job. We rushed things and moved in together after about 4 months of dating, he helped support me while I was in school and barely making 150 a week at my job. His mom died and left behind a life insurance policy, which is when he quit the job he had for only 2 months. Well, I had gotten a better job and after that money was gone, I was paying the bills and supporting us completely. He also had a drug problem, was addicted to pain killers 4 years prior to knowing me, and when he got off of those he got hooked on the drug they used to break the first addiction. Through out our entire relationship, my feelings for him were shown more often than his for me. After a few months of being sexually active with each other, he completely lost his drive, never wanted to do anything with me, I had to beg him even to cuddle which he usually did not do. We also had a few physical altercations. I have been punched, thrown to the floor, and pinned against the wall by my throat. It wasn't a frequent occurance, but when I look back I realize that it never should have happened in the first place. So, I left him. Tried to be civil and talk to him occasionally, but I ended up having to block his number because he would harass me constantly and was just too stressful. He has said from day 1 that he wants to be there for his child, will help me out in every way. I've of course had the mind set that I cannot depend on any form of help from him since a month ago he asked me for money because he couldn't support himself. So he can't support himself, and he stalks me. I cut him off in every single way. And then I find out I'm having a boy. I have no idea what to do with a boy. Circumcision? What? How do I make that decision? Plus it's not covered under Medicaid, and is definitely not cheap. So I let him know its a boy, and get his opinion. And ask if he will help pay for it. He says yes and yes and will give me a little bit of money out of every paycheck until I give birth and should cover about half of it. And then I realize that I have no one to talk to. I have friends and family, yes, but they're all limited on when I can talk to them and its not always convenient whenever my hormones kick in and I need to talk. So I started talking to him. And since I've been talking to him I've spent some time with him. He's been giving me all the attention I ever wanted throughout our relationship, and does so without one complaint or being asked to. He claims to be clean for 5 months now, but as I'm not around him everyday I do not know. And now I'm getting confused. He "seems" to be growing up, and I'm probably just hormonal and vulnerable. I want to say "too little too late" but I don't know anymore. He's ordered some onesies and is having them shipped to me house. Has already given me the first bit of money towards the curcumcision, and is offering to buy me some maternity clothes since they are so expensive and every bit of extra money I have gets put into my savings account. I know that I really can't say no to any help he wants to give, I'm just scared to inadvertently start expecting it and one day it not be there.
I'm sorry this was so long, thank you for taking the time to read this. I'm just not sure what to do. Take it one day at a time I would think. But it's very hard to do when I know how hard it's going to be just not knowing.