Update from "Really freaking out"

FionaC5

I really appreciate everyone who responded to my post about me having diarrhea, spotting, and the beginnings of bleeding, while here in Kenya.

 I went to the hospital with my boyfriend yesterday (he is an intern at a hospital and thought it the best thing). We got an ultra sound and the baby measured at 7w 6d...farther along then we even thought. The sac measured at 12w. No idea why that may be, of course there never seems to be an explaination for anything. There was no heart beat detected. 

 I went home to endure the excruciatingly painful cramps and heavy bleeding until I expelled the baby at 3:30am. Unfortunately I was alone through all of this, because my boyfriend had to work the night shift and no one was able to cover for him. 

As gross as it sounds, I stuck my hand down the toilet to retrieve the baby, I wanted to be sure my boyfriend got to see it (he works in the labor and delivery ward and sees this type of thing a lot). I also had decided that I would like to bury my precious little baby instead of flushing her down the toilet. At least I got to hold her in my hand! 

I really hope all goes well for all you expecting mothers here! I don't think anyone deserves to feel the pain of loosing such a sweet tiny little baby.

 Thanks for all the support..I'll be back one day!