What's the tipping point?

MrsAtch

This is my first post here, so I apologize if there is a posting protocol I'm not aware of. I'm hoping you can tell me what the tipping point was for you to leave?

I've been with my DH for five years, married for 3. We have an 8 month old daughter. He's a very good father. I know that he is a good man, and that he carries a tremendous amount of guilt for being the way that he is. He is a disabled Iraq war veteran and has major issues with showing any kind of emotion toward me. He doesn't ever come to bed (maybe once every few months), plays video games constantly, won't go to any events with me, etc. I've done everything I can to try to help him get better but he refuses to go back to individual counseling and won't go on medication.

We are in couples counseling (have been for 6 months bi-weekly) and it doesn't seem to be helping- if anything it has gotten worse. He doesn't drink or do drugs and isn't physically or verbally abusive. He's mostly just indifferent. There is no real connection between us anymore other than our daughter and we have nothing in common. I have to go to everything by myself and I feel lonely almost all the time. I know that he doesn't want it to be like this between us but he's not willing to do anything about it. I asked him to stay at his parents for a few days so that I can clear my head. He will be leaving tomorrow after I get home from work (he doesn't work so he watches our daughter.)

I realize this is nothing compared to what many of you have had to deal with. I guess I just don't know what to do. I feel like I'm with him because of his potential, and out of loyalty and obligation. Everything I wanted for my family seems impossible now. I still love him and care about what happens to him but I don't see myself being able to be happy like this. WWYD?