InLaws visiting after birth (posted in July 12 moms)

lewispm

Ok, so my husband's family lives about 11 hours away and we don't get to see them that often, maybe about 3-4 times a year. His mom is IN YOUR FACE with unwanted advice (she even gives advice to strangers walking past her on the street!) and often just says exactly whats on her mind, despite it being absurd and rude. Due to this, I have never really enjoyed her company, but we do "get along" for the most part (by this I mean, I bite my tongue MAJORLY while she is here and vent to my mom once she leaves...prob not the best way to deal but oh well). She is also a nurse and asks me questions on a regular basis that my modest self just isn't comfortable with. She even asks me about my DH and I's sex life!!

Anywho, I had a serious talk with DH last night about guests at our house immediately following the birth of our son (I'm a FTM) and how I dont want any for more than 2-3 nights. He brought up that his mom already discussed staying for 1-2 weeks IN OUR HOUSE! At first, I was completely adamant about this not happening and that anyone planning to stay more than 2-3 nights would need to get a hotel room. He was immediately offended by this and told me I was being completely unfair because his mom can't afford a hotel room and that would prevent her from being able to come.

His argument: He knows his mom can be a bia, but she is SO excited about this baby and my parents (who live about 15 mins away) will get to see our son everyday and watch him grow and his parents won't. He really wants his mom to be a part of this baby's life and, although he understands where I am coming from, he REALLY wants me to let her stay at our house for up to 2 weeks. He says he will talk to her about boundaries and helping around the house rather than expecting us to host her and what not. The rational, non-emotional part of me thinks it is worth it to make my husband happy, but the pregnant, emotional, and easily aggravated side of me is DREADING life immediately after baby if I give in to my husband's wishes. I mean, maybe I have a bad attitude going in, but this woman seems to ruin every vacation, family get-together, or regular weekend visit with her obnoxious comments and rude(borderline mean)ness.

Question: What would you do in this situation? Grin and bear it and deal with an annoying, over bearing, rude MIL in your house for up to 2 weeks with a newborn or stick to your guns and cause your husband to be upset/hurt?

I want to just suck it up to keep the peace, but I know I will be fuming at her the whole time she is here. I could write a novel on the rude things she has said/done to me in the 4 years I have known her, but I won't. I dread dealing with her unwanted advice, her ctiticism of EVERYTHING I do, and her constant need to be entertained/fed by my husband and I.

Help!