Anyone else afraid of giving birth?

Aspen436

I am 28 weeks and I LOVE being pregnant!!!  But I am starting to realize that I won't be pregnant for that much longer before I have to give birth.  The thought of holding my baby boy in my arms is amazing to me, but the thought of what I'll have to go through to actually hold my baby boy in my arms scares the crap out of me!!  Is anyone else scared of giving birth?  I'm a FTM so I have no idea what to expect. I'm not really freaked out about labor or contractions, I am more freaked out about the point when I will need to push the baby out of me.  I can't imagine pushing a baby the size of a watermellon out of something the size of a lemon?  I'm so small and I'm afraid of tearing.  What if I can't do it?  What if the pain is so intense that I go

unconscious  or pass out?  I'm so afraid of them doing an episiotomy on me and I am sure they will because I think I am so small down there and I have a feeling the baby is going to be big!  And what if I do get tears, will sex ever be enjoyable again after giving birth?  My doctor said that if a tear, it may take me a while to enjoy sex again but if I don't tear it may make sex more enjoyable.... I'm not sure how to feel about that.  Any words of wisdom?  Any thoughts of what might make me feel less anxious about giving birth in 2 months?  Thank you ladies xoxoxoxo