If it's natural... (my first post)

Aim33

If it is so natural to be pregnant for a woman, then why does it seem like my body has completely turned on me?  I'm asking this tongue in cheek question more out of frustration than anything else.  I am 21 weeks along.  I'm tired of reading in books about how most women have had their "morning" sickness subside.  Mine is still an issue every single day.  How about all those baby kicks?  When my Dr. was doing fetal heart tones and heard a kick he said "see... that's it."  I felt something that I would have to be concentrating really hard on to know I felt.  My baby is a bit underweight so that might have something to do with it.  I learned from reading that my baby should be about 11 ounces right now.  So why when I went to Florida Perinatal and they measured my baby at 6 ounces did they not say anything about it?  Apparently it's not the norm for my baby to be this far along and this small.  Or is it within normal range?  It seems like just about anything could be considered either something to worry about, or totally normal depending on who you are talking to.  

Other facts about me that make me feel like my body is turning on me beside the constant "morning" sickness.  I have lost 25 lbs. since becoming pregnant.  Pretty normal huh? My weight has always been steady before becoming  pregnant, and if anything I have struggled to lose extra weight. Now despite trying to eat right I continue to lose pounds every week.

If I even look at my gums with a piece of floss in my hand they start to bleed, and brushing my teeth with a tooth brush makes me vomit.  I feel so completely gross.  I get pains in my boobs and my stomach and ... *warning this is TMI*  I can't go #2 in the bathroom on my own at all without taking medicine to make me go.  It's like that function has completely shut down.  I drink about 60oz. of water a day just to be told that I am dehydrated and my keytones are huge, which has already put me in the hospital once.  No matter how much water I drink I get told the same thing...

It's hard to not feel like I am failing at carrying this baby sometimes.  Sometimes I just let myself cry about it, although I know I am doing the best I can.  I just dont feel like my brain and my body are on the same page.  Can anyone out there understand?  I would appreciate some kind words. By the way, this is my first post and Hi to everyone.

Aimee