Wisdom from someone who's been doing this awhile

achase123

I really want to comment on all posts on this board but I just don't have the time to repeat myself over and over again so I thought I'd put it into this post and hopefully people will read it and listen.

Ladies: you don't HAVE to do anything that your ex wants you to do, which isn't stipulated in the CO.  99.9% of the time what they're telling you is BS anyways, and usually for the sake of maintaining control/manipulation.  Don't let them.

It's YOUR choice to engage in these conversations and you CAN and SHOULD hang up the phone and/or stop the texting and emails.  Take control of your own life and stop playing the victim to the madness.  It takes two to tango.  Make the decision to stop the ridiculous dance.

If you have legal questions ask an attorney.  That's your best source.  Not other SP poster (usually, BGG being the exception), not your friends, not your family, and MOST DEFINITELY not your X and/or HIS family.

Being a SP is certaily difficult and can be stressful too, but the best way to mitigate this stress is to alleviate every source of it that you CAN from your life.  This usually means limiting contact with the X and setting FIRM, CLEAR boundaries. 

I'm not trying to come off like I know everything, because I do not.  I've been through exactly what you all have before and so I'm attempting to give you some of the wisdom and lessons that I've had to learn through trial and error.  It's definitely easier said than done but you'll thank me and yourself for listening to this advice in the end.