Guilt about bottle feeding

BluPeet

I had my second daughter on Friday.  I was able to have a successful breastfeeding relationship with my first daughter however this time around things are not going well.  My sweet babe has a good latch however she is stronger than she looks and has a nasty habit of clamping down on my nipple midway through feeding.  After five days of feeding both of my nipples are so cracked that they are covered completely in scabs.  The hardest thing is seeing her covered in my blood after each feeding; that and she spits up the blood afterwards too.  So I think the best thing for my family is to switch to the bottle.  I just hate the guilt that I feel that I am not doing all that I could.  However this difficulty along with my hormones and difficult postpartum recovery has me feeling very blue.  I have seeked help and the nurse I saw today was encouraging regardless of decision.  She said it appeared that I was doing everything right but also commented that my nipples looked awful.  The nurse also tested my daughters sucking reflex in the hospital and noticed the clamp down motion too.  I guess is anyone else going through this?  I am so sad to think that I will not get the joy feeding my child that I did with my first and I fear the judgement of the public and the "breast is best" movement.  

As I fold laundry the sight of my nursing bras has me reduced to tears and has me feeling like a failure.....