Feeling bad for my DH and inlaws during the holidays (NBR, long vent)

learningfromlife

So Christmas is obviously approaching very quickly. My FIL is supposed to make a 10 hour round trip Friday to pick up my BIL, his BSC wife and their 11 month old. They were under the assumption that the BIL and family would be spending the majority of their time with them since A)The BSC wife brought the baby up for the ENTIRE month of November and my IL's got literally 2 hours with the baby and They're the ones renting a car and putting out a bunch of money to go get them (BIL and wife aren't the most responsible people ever and have no car whatsoever so if my IL's want to see them they pretty much have to go get them).

Well... I told my MIL it sounded like little miss BSC was planning on spending the time with her mom, especially Christmas and she's very controlling of BIL so I figured they wouldn't see much of him or the baby either. She kept being optimistic saying that the BIL misses his brother and will be at my house for Christmas with the rest of the family.

Turns out I was right unfortunately. She flat out asked him about it the other day and not only were they planning to basically get up here and spend all their time with her family, but they also assumed my MIL was just going to hand over her car keys so they could go wherever whenever while they were here. 

My husband is IRATE with his brother. BIL continues to allow his wife to strain relations between him and his parents (apparently it's how he's always been with women) but my husband is the most irritated at how ungrateful they are being and how they thought my MIL was just going to be without a vehicle so they can spend all their time at her mom's house. 

My IL's have seen my BIL and their granddaughter once since February, and that was when they went and picked them up for our wedding in June and now it looks like they aren't coming up at all because the BSC wife had a temper tantrum when she found out that my MIL wasn't going to be a taxi, nor was she going to hand over her car keys.

I just feel bad for all of them. Other antics by the wife have cause a ton of bad blood with my husband's family and I just hope she grows up soon... I'm not the type to ever say this but I genuinely feel sorry for our niece because she's missing out on an entire side of her family because her mom acts like a 13 year old, and I feel bad for my girls because they will likely never get to have any sort of relationship with their cousin.