Tell me about your joint custody arrangement....

mdotm0904

Hi ladies! Still trying to get adjusted to this motherhood thing, I haven't cried in a couple of days so I guess that's a good sign. We'll see what happens once my mom goes back to work this week though & I'm on my own lol.

Anyway, I've been doing lots of thinking about the impending custody case that I have coming up & I'm pretty sure he filed for joint custody (I'm still waiting to be served to see if he actually filed for joint or sole). And other than the fact that our baby is a freakin newborn and needs to be with the mother right now, there's no reason why he shouldn't (& prob wouldn't be awarded some sort of joint custody in the future.) I've never been opposed to a joint custody schedule (down the line naturally)...just not a 50/50 week on/week off thing like he has with his other kids (which I'm sure he wants. He just keeps saying he wants 50/50).

The information website that Legal aid gave me said that joint custody is when the child has two residences & the child spends At least 35% of time with the other parent. Im still trying to figure out how a child can technically have "two" residences (what address do you use for school forms, which parent gets to claim the child on taxes, whose health insurance does the child go on, and other things like that?) I'm still trying to find a lawyer that will work out a payment Plan because I have no money (we're actually close to losing our house if we can't figure things out soon) & I'm afraid of doing pro se (even though I know People do it all the time).

So just out of curiosity, for anyone who has a joint custody arrangement, how do you have it split? 50/50? 65/35? When does the dad get the kids? (week on/week off? EOW?)

I'm also pretty annoyed that just because he's not on the birth certificate & has initiated a custody case, he's decided he won't have anything to do with her for now. He hasn't seen her since the day before I left the hospital (the night we had our blow up which was 2wks ago). No calls or emails. (and i refuse to email or call him with updates about her!) If he cares so much about her that he needs to file for custody, wouldn't you have checked on her by now? Asked how a doc's appt has gone or SOMETHING!!! stupid male ego (sorry just had to rant)

EDIT: i was on my phone so i put in paragraphs & fixed minor typos