Ultrasound update: No Heartbeat :(

missyjg

I'm so utterly sad and defeated right now. Our angel #13, 7 weeks 1 day, no HB (Writing that out..GOD, what am I doing?). My Beta dropped significantly so my wonderful OB prepped me for the worst and he went to the ultrasound with me. I've been here before, I can handle this... I have to wait and see if natural m/c starts or I'm going in for a d&c.

 I told DH about the pregnancy last night. We are going to re-evaluate everything in a couple of months, that's where we left it. He promised nothing drastic(ie. no vesectomy) until we talk with the RE again. Who was I fooling, I can't do this without him. Tonight=snuggle time with B, wine, hot bath, greasy food, big bowl of icecream, friends re-runs and nyquil since I have a horrible wicked cold and sinus infection.

I am so so thankful for what I do have. I really am, B is the light of my life. I have a great job, a great family and I have wonderful supportive friends. I just know I'm meant to mother another child, I see this child in my dreams. I don't know if it's wishful thinking, if I'm a masocist or just gone off the deep end. Ha, ask my friends and they might say the latter.

Sorry to dump all this on you ladies. Thanks for all the positive thoughts. Just wasn't in the cards this time I guess.