It gets better, right?

Spooners

J and I are still living together. We still sleep in the same bed. At times, it is like things are the way they used to be. Then I realize - they're not. 

He's not in love with me. He doesn't want to be with me. I asked him last night if he is sure this is what he wants and he said yes.

It's not healthy to stay in a relationship when someone isn't happy. It's not smart to stay in a relationship only for the kids. I get this. But why is it so hard?

J visited with a lawyer yesterday to ask him some questions. Clearly I have no rights to anything pertaining to the house because we aren't married.

They discussed custody, child support, and the such. We can keep it out of court if we agree on things. He wants to do that because apparently the lawyer told him judges do not seem to rule with the dad in MI. 

They also discussed, from what it sounds like to me, paying me off. He wants to give me one lump sum of money to get out of the house and get back on my feet. I'm not sure if it's a good idea, or if I should fight to stay in the house and keep my kids in their home.

 

My feelings keep flip-flopping. One hour I'm find and dandy and know it is for the best, then the next I'm an emotional wreck because I'm losing the man I love.

Someone please tell me this gets better?