Rock and hard place

Brook108

I don't want him to stay.  I don't want him to go. Concerns I have about becoming a single mom.  Who will love my child besides me, children need more than one caregiver in their life who will love them and who they can love.  I can't be her everything she needs many people who will love her.  Maybe I should move back to where my mom lives so she will at least have me and her grandma. 

I don't want to be a single mom because I need affection too, right now I get negative attention, but really I have spent years not having any male attention (no sex or dating).  I got so lonely that I ended up in this abusive relationship because at some point even negative attention is better than no attention at all.  Please don't tell me I have to be happy with myself first.  The reason I was alone for so many years is because I am happy being alone so happy being alone I overlooked my need for affection. How do you get male affection as a single mom.

I don't want him to stay because I am sick of turning to someone who hits, calls me names and bosses me around for affection and I don't want my daughter to be part of his and my dynamics.  

Really I want him to change but guess what... He probably won't.... and if he does I will probably be more of a basket case than I am right now.