Friend Issues

ilovemybunny

I don't know if anyone remembers my previous post (I thought it was fairly memorable due to the absurd amount of views it got), but I'll link it nonetheless so I don't have to recap our story again...

http://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/49276924.aspx

If at all possible, I would like to just get opinions on the current issue instead of be lectured about the age difference, but I understand if that's unavoidable...

I followed the advice given before, ceased all communication, asked my friends to no longer talk to him, and things were going well. Until...I get two harassing voice mails from my EX talking about how dumb I am and so on. I wonder why he called me so randomly to express all of this, so I call my best friend and tell her about it...she acts uncomfortable and tells me she has to go. So obviously, she talked to him about me. She finally admits to me that they have been hanging out, and actually had lunch the other day. I ask her to please not talk to him anymore because it causes unwanted stress. She agrees. 

Fast forward a month or two, she tells me that she saw him at a bar the other night and they actually hung out the whole night. I asked her why she, out of all of my friends, is the only one still keeping contact with him, and she tells me that I'm not in charge of who she is friends with, so I should just calm down. She tells me that I am actually the manipulative one, not the EX, because he never tells her who she can and can't talk to. She said it's her nature to be at peace with everyone, especially if they did nothing to harm her.

Fast forward to last night, I recieved a call from another one of my good friends telling me that she sees my friend, the EX, and a few other people at Ihop together at 2:30 in the morning. I ask the friend about it this morning and she then goes on to tell me, that she is actually ministering to him because he is going through a hard time right now, keep in mind that they only know each other because he and I dated. He's going to jail next week (I have no idea why, i think it has to do with drug court) and she wanted to give him a "farewell" hangout. She continues to tell me how selfish and manipulative I am for asking her not to talk to him. I try and explain my reasoning as to why I don't want her to talk to him (i don't want court issues, it causes unnecessary stress, he's a jerk, he's going to make her believe everything he says) and she then quotes Bible verses at me attempting to justify her actions. She said she's just trying to save him and make him a better person, thus ruling out the court issues. When I said I just want to make sure that my daughter will be safe, she replies with "Everything is in God's hands, he will fix everything." I then told her we can no longer communicate because it was getting ridiculous.

 

So, my question to you opinionated ladies, is was that a selfish thing for me to ask? Am i being manipulative for asking her not to talk to him? I have a consultation with my lawyer in two weeks to ask for legal advice. It's really upsetting to lose someone I've been very close for a long time because of this situation, however, I'm scared that her and my Ex's newfound aqcuaintanceship is going to cause a lot of issues.

 Thanks in advance...