Wish this year would fly by!

CowboysWife04

The first year of being separated/divorced anyway.  I'm really hoping that after the first year of being without him, I won't be so angry when things come up we should be doing as a family.  For example, the circus is in town next weekend so I have to ask him if I can have the girls back early on Sunday so I can take them to the circus.  It's something that comes around once a year and we should be taking them to the circus as a family, but that won't happen ever again.  Definitely know he won't take them to the circus because then he'd actually have to do something with them other than set around and watch tv. 

I am just so mad at the person he became and the fact he couldn't be a good father and husband.  I'm so mad I could cry! Why? Why couldn't he just buck up and be a real man for us?!?  He should be the one there taking the girls to the park with me, taking them to swimming lessons, taking family vacations etc!

It was my decision to leave which sometimes makes me feel guilty for being upset at him.  However, it was his decision to make the decisions he did, and show the girls exactly how a daddy should NOT treat a mommy. 

Sorry for all the venting...had to get this off my chest before I see him tomorrow.