Wondering what to do...(long)

Jamison13

I hate to air my business out here like this but I really need advice. Friends and family are offering their advice but I want a 3rd party opinion (so to speak).

 I'll start from the beginning. 

 He and I have been acquaintances for the last 1 1/2 years. He is 21 (almost 22) and I am 25. We hooked up on Thanksgiving, condom broke, and on Christmas I found out I was pregnant. I told him as soon as I found out. I let him know that I didn't expect anything from him except that he help me financially with the baby and once he was ready to be a dad I would let him into our baby's life. Since then I have been sharing everything with him. When my appointments are, ultrasound pics, baby shower details, what the baby may possibly be, etc. I am only 17 weeks along and around 12/13 weeks we saw each other out and about and he asked if I would come by and talk to him about our baby's future, so naturally I said yes and showed up. Well I showed up and all he wanted to do was sleep with me again, and that made me mad and I told him to talk to me when he was either ready to be their for the baby or be there for me and the baby. But I have still been sharing all the baby news with him. Oh and throughout all of this I have kept his "identity" quiet so no one but my closest friends know who the father of my baby is. It is nerve wracking to keep that to myself too since it makes everyone look at me like some kind of home wrecker because they think it is some married guy or something.

 

So my problem is this... 

 I am in the military, stationed in Okinawa, Japan. I will be moving to Texas in May. He was supposed to be going to the same base I am but I think they are discharging him because he got into some trouble. I am not sure if he is going to be reachable when the baby comes and/or if he will keep up his end of the agreement that he will help with the financial parts of the baby's life until he is ready to be more.  He doesn't respond to any of the emails I send him (he does not have a phone) and he still has not told his parents about our baby. I am worried that once I get to TX and he gets kicked out and moves to where ever he is going to move to (he is from OK, about 5 hours from where I will be stationed) that I won't be able to find him and he will be out of our baby's life forever.I am also debating on telling people who the father is just so maybe his superiors and his friends might be able talk some sense into him.

 I grew up without my dad but my brother's dad was there for me. I want to be sure that my baby has a constant father figure in their life since we will not be living near my family.  I also want to be sure that I can provide everything possible for our child and I want him to feel the same way.I know I cannot change the way he feels completely but if he showed any sign of carrying that would make me happy.

 Please lend me your advice. I apologize at the length of the post and if it sounds at all whiney. I am close to reaching my breaking point with him and want to be sure I do the right thing before its too late to do anything at all.

 Thank you.