Could use some advice/support

alibabbbs

DS's first overnight with XH is next week, and my anxiety is through the roof, as in, I am considering going on anti-anxiety medication because it is all I can think about and I am worried to the point where my stomach is all messed up and I'm making mistakes at work because I am so distracted. I am really feeling not okay.

I figure there are things that are likely to happen that I can live with: Homewrecking Skankwhore is going to be there playing mom to my son, XH is going to have a few beers, they are going to smoke cigarettes, DS will eat gross food, and DS will go to bed late and get off schedule.

These are all far from ideal, but what is consuming me is that DS is going to scream and cry all night long, and XH is not going to comfort him. Every time DS has slept in a new place, which has only been at my parent's house, my sister's house, and one hotel room, he has woken up at least every hour screaming. At home, he wakes up mumbling and then singing, but when he has slept in different places, he seems to wake up in a panic, terrified because he doesn't know where he is. XH is an extremely deep sleeper. Pretty much nothing wakes him up. He does not have a monitor and just told me that he will not be getting one and will not borrow mine. At his apartment, the second bedroom is pretty far from XH's bedroom.

Even if XH were to wake up, he always wanted DS to "cry it out" so will probably ignore him. DS has been STTN for eight months now, so it has nothing to do with sleep training.

I've tried explaining my concerns to XH, but he ignores me. I realize a lot of you are going to think I am overreacting, but the thought of my sweet baby screaming because he's terrified while being left alone in a strange place absolutely breaks my heart. WWYD? I can't let this one go and don't know how to fix it.