Tough Situation: When to tell family?

VegasGal1978

In 2011 I had an ectopic pregnancy at 6w4d.  Given this, my hubby and I were set on not letting the cat out of the bag until we hit 12w.  For that pregnancy, we hadn't told ANYONE.  A few very close relatives learned after the ectopic, those who know us so well it's hard to hide from them.  But that was all.

This time, those same few relatives know that I am prego.  We thought it was only fair for them to share in the good, since they supported us during the bad.  For the large scale announcement, we really want to wait until 12w.

Here's where it gets tough....

My MIL is very sick with Cancer.  Chemo treatments have been stopped and Hospice is visiting her two times a week.  She is one of the close relatives that knows.

She wants to tell the world, but we asked her to wait until we were more sure that this was for real.  She thinks we are being "unfair".   She has this wonderful news and wants to share it, but we are holding her back.

There is a chance that she may not be here for the birth of our child. OMG, that's the first time I've said that. It horrifies me. This is the only happy thing she really has going on right now.  

Do we let her tell the world?  I am only 4w5d, so now is way too soon.  Maybe we wait until we see a heartbeat, then let her share?  I don't know.  We are really torn.