WWYD? re: flying for work

Free2Sing

There is a training I was supposed to go to earlier in the year.  It only occurs about 4 times a year, though, and there's not a super strict policy about it.  It's kind of just a "help you do your job better once you already know what you're doing" sort of thing with new ideas & networking, etc.

It's a plane flight away (a short one- less than 2 hours) & will be right at the 30-31 week mark.

-I don't want to go just yet-- it's expensive for my boss to send me, and although I plan on working after I have LO, what if I change my mind & don't?  That would be a terrible waste of money for them, and leave me with huge amounts of guilt.

-I am NOT a good plane rider.  I get really worried about every little bump in turbulence & take off & landing get extremely close to an all out anxiety attack.  Last time I rode a plane, I had a headache/borderline migrane for the duration of my trip.  I freak out during the entire flight & actually enjoy when there are crying babies on the plane bc I totally sympathize with them & wish I could cry & carry on like that as well.  So basically I spend the entire flight doing breathing exercises & drinking.  And obviously drinking is out for this flight.

-The downside is, if I don't go now, and I do stay on at my job (which I plan to do), then I'll have to go after LO is born-- and that means leaving my LO behind!  I'm pretty sure I won't like that!

-My boss is really putting major pressure on me without realizing it.  Although we have a great relationship, she (and her husband, who own the company) assumes that I'm going & the only reason why I wouldn't is if the dr says I can't.  She has had 2 others before me quit bc they've had a kid, and I think that she's banking on me going, getting hooked, and being "sold out" for the company.  As in, if I go, it's security for her that I won't quit after baby is born.

I really don't want to waste their money, and I really do get stressed when flying, and I don't think that can be very good for the baby.

Sooo... ideas on what to tell boss lady?  The truth is just a little too harsh for me to deliver, I feel.  I do want to keep my job for now!