Need all the thoughts you can send...

JerseyGirlAtHeart

I havent stopped crying all day, so if this in not coherant, I am sorry . I got my second beta back today and its only 17. It went up 1. I knew something was up with the Dr. called me himself.  He is sending me for one more beta on Wednesday, before he looses hope in this pregnancy. He said he has seen stranger things happen, whatever that means. I am just so beside myself. 

We went through so much to get here. Its just not fair. DH still has hope. I am trying to. I keep trying to tell myself that today I am pregnant and I love my baby. Everyone keeps saying atleast I got pregnant, but that is just making it worse because I want to know WHY I cant stay pregnant or why everything has to be so hard. I know it sounds bad, but if its over, I just want it to be over. I hate all this waiting.